Who is on SPALS?

Who else is on SPALS?

Typically, about 400 people are on SPALS. As a typical snapshot: on October 25, 2000 we were 422 subscribers (with some of these subscriptions representing 2 parents), custodians of 433 live children and parents of 771 angels, with 120 of us currently pregnant and many others trying.

Our circumstances vary widely and individually. Our loss experiences range from the first trimester through toddler years.

In addition to current pregnancies, we represent hundreds of experiences with pregnancy after a loss.

We both seek and provide information, understanding and support. We exchange some 20 to 40 messages each day -- depending on our levels of energy -- with most activity on week days. We strive to maintain a "safe haven" that welcomes people of all pregnancy loss backgrounds, in an atmosphere of support and tolerance.

We are from all over the world. Our average age is about 30 -- but some of us are much older or much younger.

See also: the Bio List, the Pregnant Moms List and the Trying Moms List


Is there anyone from SPALS who lives in my area?

SPALS people are from all over the world. To find out if another SPALS member lives in your general area, check the Bio List. The Bio List begins with an index of members by location -- listing members' email addresses so you can identify them in the detailed bio listings.

As an example of the diversity of SPALS, based on the home location of some 2100 distinct families participating in the first five years, SPALS members have represented every continent except (to our knowledge) Antarctica.

See also: What is the Bio List


Does anyone else on SPALS have a similar loss?

People on SPALS represent a tremendous diversity of loss experiences. While no two losses are ever exactly the same, chances are someone else on the list has had a similar experience.

To help find others with similar loss experiences, our Bio List is coded with terms and abbreviations that are consistent. To find someone with a similar loss, there are two approaches:

  • Post your story to the list and ask if there are others with similar situations who are willing to share their experiences with you.
  • Search through the Bio List (preferably using software) for terms that would describe loss experiences similar to yours.

See also: What is the Bio List


How can I meet with people for conversation?

People on SPALS occasionally meet for conversation -- usually, someone volunteers to coordinate a gathering. Gatherings can be either "real" or "virtual":

  • Meeting "face to face" with people in your part of the world.
  • Meeting for "real time" conversation using one of the Internet technologies suited to such discussion.

Face to face gatherings

Those who have gathered together report that it is a delight to meet their SPALS friends in person. Such gatherings may be arranged on the initiative of people in a common location or area. Use the Bio List to identify other SPALS members in your area. And be sure to let the list know when you are arranging a gathering -- just in case another member of SPALS may be passing through!

Online discussions

Numerous technologies are available to facilitate online discussions: IRC, ICQ, web chat areas, and a variety of "instant messaging" services. Experienced users of these technologies often include their contact information along with their bio.

Online gatherings may be arranged on the initiative of individual members -- choose a time and be sure to inform others of how and where they can meet with you. Or, if you prefer, you can make it clear that people may simply "drop in" when they are online.

See also: Is there anyone in my area